Maureen Dowd is a New York Times columnist with a lead foot prose who often clumsily tries to be glib and profound while aiming arrows at President Bush. Her latest column is “Biking Toward Nowhere”, poking fun at a President who she claims does not have his priorities straight because he golfs and fishes while commanding the military in wartime. Funny that FDR laughed to reporters during World War II and the Holocaust–did that make him an idiot?

Drawing parallels between the elder Bush and his son, she recounts a 1991 incident where the two Bushes were golfing while reporters harrassed them with questions. “Hey, can’t you wait until we finish hitting, at least?” was W’s response to the pests which Dowd termed sarcastically as “having his priorities straight”.

Her explanation for the overthrow of Sadaam and the institution of democracy in the despotic region naturally is Freudian: “The son wanted to go into Iraq to best his Daddy in the history books.” Her imaginery version of psychological truth is deemed more objective (and quite funnier) than that of the Pentagon and the Administration who “can no longer cling to their version of reality”. Dowd has a clear and faultless conception of “reality” assuredly.

This August has provided the media with the dramatic sight of a few dozen protesters standing outside the Bush ranch in Crawford, Texas. They have held up signs and planted crosses and spoke about their objections to the Iraq war (a war which also is bundled like an iMAC G5 with other sentimental software issues like the Palestinians).

There is a mother waiting outside of the gates of the President’s ranch, who due to her tragic loss of a soldier son, is now considered an expert by many anti-warriors on how to end the war. If Dowd and others are right about Iraq, perhaps we should have never gone to Baghdad, maybe it was better to just leave Sadaam Hussein in power, even the search for Osama Bin Laden should finally end. Why not just go back to the way things were before 9/11? Do the same hearts who plead for peace understand that the enemy kills hundred of Iraqis a week? Only today, 43 died in one bus terminal explosion in Baghdad!

The bike ride to nowhere is up in the Hollywood Hills, along the boutiques of Madison Avenue, on the breezy island of Nantucket, and in the salons of Beverly Hills. Places where the fashionable and coy Maureen Dowd hangs out. The frivolity and gaiety are on the Op-Ed pages. The deadly business of fighting for civil government, human rights, and the defeat of terror goes on in Iraq and Afghanistan.

Dowd should go on patrol in the Sunni Triangle and bring some Guerlain just in case the tank smells musty.